I am like my 'Enemy'

​Part One
A lot of people start blogs when they go abroad. I didn't want to blog simply because I was abroad, but the fact of the matter is, is that being here opens your eyes to new things- many things worth writing about. The experience of studying abroad impacts everyone differently, and depending on the environment you enter into, you will be changed in different ways. 

I have been in London studying at Regent's University for about a month now. Coming from a Catholic, Jesuit institution, where I feel connected and loved by my community, to a new private, international school was a large adjustment. I walked in, feeling like a freshman all over again, with no close friends, no involvement, and no history. ​

My time here has been filled with ups and downs, just as expected, but in ways that I could not have for seen. My new university boasts incredible diversity, and my classes are filled with academics from all over the world. I have one class with students from the United Kingdom, Turkey, Spain, Germany, the Netherlands, the United States and Argentina. Talk about diverse- this place lives and breathes it. It's refreshing to be surrounded by so many varying perspectives. 

What I could not have anticipated was something that had become a staple in my education. Service of others. Everything about Saint Louis University revolves around the other. Questions of: How will my education affect the world around me?,  How can I use my life to give back to my community? I found that these questions were no longer central to the education I was receiving. I began to separate myself from my community, reflecting on how they were missing the whole point, or even entertaining the idea that they just did not care. I had begun to see myself as separate from the community I was now a part of- a community that was different than I was used to, yet one that I should identify with because I am just as much a part of it as any other student that attends here.

Part Two
"Some one who sees no resemblance between himself and his enemy, who believes that all the evil is in the other and none in himself, is tragically destined to resemble his enemy. But someone who, recognizing evil in himself, discovers that he is like his enemy is truly different. By refusing to see the resemblance, we reinforce it; by admitting it we diminish it. The more I think I am different, the more I'm the same; the more I think I'm the same, the more I am different.."
 {Philosopher Tzvetan Todorov} 

I recently spent a weekend in Oslo, Norway and I happened across the Cathedral in the heart of the city. In the right corner of the church stood a collection of cloths, all with various quotes stitched on them. From afar, they seem quite out of place and not particularly aesthetically pleasing. Upon closer observation, I realized it was an art installation collaborated by Lise Bjorn Linnert and Lars Fr. H Svendsen.  Each clothe examined the "theme of evil."

At first, this struck me as out of place. The church, and a life in union with God, are said to bring abundant joy. I find it preaches love of neighbor, harmony with the environment and joy in the embrace of our Creator. So why focus on the evil? Doesn't this seem counterproductive in a place of worship and peace?

Yet I could not stop thinking about this quote and how it related to my life. In many ways, it is easy to see horrible things on the news or judge others for the rude comments they make and wonder how someone could ever act that way. Todorov challenges us by asking us to not separate ourselves from others, regardless of how seemingly awful or contradictory to you they may be. So much of who we are is shaped by our environment, and so much of what we do affects everyone around us. Each person is collection of the biology of their ancestors and the environment they have lived in, and it is impossible to condemn someone who may have had a drastically different set of experiences than your own. It is in recognizing that any person, who began life perfectly good and whole, can be affected in good or bad ways by the world around them, that we can identify with each other. We can see that no person is inherently evil and in identifying with them, we grow and begin to see our similarities between all people.

"The more I think I am the same, the more I am different."

The more we try to truly see humanity and ourselves in everyone, the more each person sets themselves apart from what the world teaches us. It is in recognizing our collective humanity that we move beyond and become truly different in our goals and actions towards others.

Part Three 
So, in a very simple way, I reassessed by attitude and intentions towards my new university. This is a place filled with diversity, passion and discovery, that given the chance, could grow for the better. It just takes someone to start the conversation. There are plenty of people here who care about others and want to make the world a better place, I just was not truly looking for them. However, they are all around me. Maybe, if given the right platform, these ideas of service and solidarity with others will begin to grow and become a stronger presence on campus.

I believe everyone, deep down, desires to love and be loved by others. People want to care for the world around them, even if they do not recognize it within themselves yet. I know I have been raised and educated in an environment that challenges me and encourages me to always think of others before myself and how I can make a positive impact in my community.

I realized that I was so quick to judge and separate myself from those of privilege here, my "enemies" so to speak, when I had no concept of the background or environment from which they were coming. I did not allow the "other," in this case, many of the full time students here, to share their story or show their heart. I did not allow us to move from enemy or other to friend. This "experiencing the other" is the very reason I wanted to begin a service organization on campus, yet I finally understood that that way of seeing yourself in others should be lived here on campus as well. It took me leaving and coming across a random art installment to open my eyes, and for that, I am grateful.

I know that I can only do what is in my capabilities. I trust that if I continue to strive to listen to my heart and work for a change, that those little actions will hopefully start small ripples. I cannot fix everything, nor could I possibly know the best way to create the environment I desire, but I am confident that the people here will take my small contribution and run with it.  For it is in the little ways, the little combinations of many, that great things can be accomplished.

Installation in Oslo, Norway

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